First, thank you to Skyepuppy and Janice whose comments and thoughts and prayers mean so much. Thanks also to Bekah, I know you tried to post and yes, I did read your email and appreciate your understanding and encouragement as well.
Now a quick update...nothing much has changed except that now we have more going on with some work-related pressures to add to the mess. UGH....what else can I say?
It's easy for me, when I hear someone else talk about their worries and troubles to remind them that God has everything under control and that they shouldn't worry because God will take care of them. So why is it so hard to follow my own (good and true) advice? I do believe what I say for other people. I believe it for myself, but the worrying part...I'm still working on that. I don't want to worry about any of it. I try not to. But I still do. So it brings to mind an old Sunday school song I once knew...
"He's still working on me....to make me what I ought to be. It took Him just a week to make the moon and the stars...the sun and earth and Jupiter and Mars. How loving and patient He must be....He's still working on me."
To think that I am more complex, and frankly difficult, than creating the entire universe and setting it into motion is pretty humbling. To think that it is taking me so long to simply fully trust God and leave my life in His hands without worrying is also humbling. To think that He looks at me in the same way that I look at Emily, who is terrified to the point of hysteria of falling asleep without me holding her, and who says, as I say to Emily, "You know I'll still be in the house with you. I'll never leave you, I'll always love you and I won't let anything (truly) bad happen to you. I know you can do this because I've taught you how, now you just have to trust Me."
"How loving and patient He must be...He's still working on me..."
5 comments:
Christina - you made me cry - and I needed it. Our details are different, but you put it so well. I feel like a baby in God's arms too - and yesterday I was flat out yelling at Him to please do something so that I know He's still there...these words are perfect. Thank you. Bekah
Bekah,
I didn't mean to make you cry, but then again, sometimes that's what we need. And trust me...He's still there, we're just too busy throwing a fit and getting ourselves all worked up to think clearly. But when we calm down and start listening and thinking rationally again...He'll be right where we left Him.
Sorry things are rough for you as well...maybe it's partly the time of year and all the extra stress? Who knows, but call me (or email me) if you want to talk. You know where to find me!
Thanks, Christina.
It's easy to be comforting and strong for others.
It's hard to take our own advice.
My prayers are with you....
Christina - you know I love a good cry. It's better (and cheaper) than buying eye makeup remover. :) And I think you hit it again - I was too busy throwing a fit to hear what He was trying to say to me.
I might be making things rougher on myself than they need to be. I have a tendency to do that. Work hurts sometimes - I feel out of place here. Yet I don't feel that it's time to move elsewhere yet. He must be growing me. WOW it can really hurt.
I wanted to call the other night but it was late, so I didn't. But I miss you.
love - Bekah
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